Bad Ass Girls

James Allen said "People do not attract that which they want, but that which they are". 

I give up.  I love bad boys.  Relapse mode: engaged.

A Girl's Bed Is Her Best Friend

I hereby declare that the days of letting a man that you have "slept" with, actually sleep with you, are over. That is, of course, unless you really like him and want to see him again. Otherwise, he's gotta go! I hear it from my girlfriends time and time again. Oh, I didn't get any sleep last night because I finally had sex with so and so. Why? Because unlike most men, we cannot sleep soundly with a man in our bed that we don't want to cook breakfast for. (Passing out doesn't count). But women and men alike, feel obligated to let someone sleep in our beds. Where is this obligation coming from? Is it just a social standard that we have come to accept and no longer question? Why is it so hard for us to nicely and respectfully say to each other, "okay, I'll talk to you soon, goodbye". The other side of the coin here is the ideal situation, where you wake up next to someone that you are really excited about and would love to spend the whole next day in bed with. Alas, those people are a rare gift, with the makings of a real love, aren't they? And so, for that person that we know that we just want to have sex with, we really don't want them sleeping in our beds, because that privilege should be saved for someone special, in my humble opinion.

My best friend once told me that her grandmother used to say to her "your bed is your best friend", when she was a little girl. I guess we never grow out of some things.

The Reconciliation Fantasy of Love Addiction

In a Love Addict's perfect world, we would see each other across the room and would not be afraid to look into each other's eyes. There would be no bitterness, no more anger. Everyone else would disappear and I would run into his arms. He would hold me tight and say that he was so very sorry. I would say it's okay now. We would not fight our destiny to be together any more. We would commit for real, we would depend on each other, have realistic expectations, speak the truth of our hearts, accept and divulge, communicate responsibly, maturely and never let anyone come in between our unbreakable bond of destiny.

Goodbye To A One In A Million

When Patrick Swayze first came onto the Hollywood scene, he was the ultimate sexy, bad boy. Displaying his gorgeous arms, and a genuine smile, he fought the bad guys and won. And, of course, I adored him. He was the leader of the pack. I watched 'The Outsiders' and 'Roadhouse' over and over, and watched him from film to film, panting over his easy, righteous, masculine authority. He was King.

In the real world, he was even more manly than the characters that he portrayed. His Queen was his wife, Lisa. He clearly loved and worshipped her, and was married to her for 34 years. They renewed their wedding vows last year, after 33 years of marriage, which is absolutely unheard of in Hollywood.

Goodbye Patrick. I will miss you, and will never forget you. Thank you for being so bad, and so good.

Football Weekends

Football season is officially upon us again. All one has to know, to find out how important this sport is to American culture, is to hear the words of the late John Heisman, "it is better to have died a small boy, than to fumble this football".

So make fire, eat, drink and be merry this day. Have a great Sunday everyone!

A Kiss That Stops Time

Have you ever kissed someone and it was so good that it just stopped time?

Fantasy Football

It's that time of the year again! Men everywhere are a giddy with excitement for the first kick-off of football season. Like little elves, they start forming groups and gathering all of their information ammunition for fantasy football leagues. Participating men that I've asked, spend between 1-12 hours a week on this hobby... or fantasy rather.

Betty Swallows

A while back, a girlfriend and I were having a beer at my favorite pub. Whilst looking for our drunken, name-clad dollar bills that decorated the bar area in its entirety, all the way to the ceiling, we looked up and saw the words 'Betty Swallows'. This just so happened to be the third time in a row within one week that we had seen reference to 'swallowing' in a bar (yes, it was a tough week). We both looked at each other and said in stereo "oh Jesus, is that back again"?
Which leads me to several questions. Firstly, how important is swallowing? Secondly, do sexual fetishes come and go like fashion trends? Oh God, am I old enough to have seen them go out of style and come back already? Lastly, who is named Betty these days?

Speaking Of Dick

Okay, this is just funny. If all men were required to wear pants this tight, we women would not have the 'Male Mystery' problem!

The Mystery of Men

We are all fooled from time to time by the opposite sexes outward appearance and persona, but for the most part, in my opinion, some people have the ability to "size someone up" quickly, and others do not. Except in the case of "dick".

If you are single, you can clearly and usually instantly see if you are attracted to someone or not. However, men have a very unfair advantage in this area. A man can see if a girls body is going to work for him sexually or not over her clothing. Over clothing, he can get a pretty good idea of breast size, waist size, ass and on down the line. And if he talks to her, and gets a couple of drinks into her, he can probably even, generally size up, how the sex is going to be. But for us girls, we can only "size" men up to a certain point. We can say that we like what we hear, we like what we see... so far. Wanting to know if his wang is going to work for us is like a plague of the mind. Some women want an average size, some women don't mind smaller (as long as he's a good lover), and some women want the big one. It's like a Christmas present underneath of the tree that you have no idea what it is, and you don't know how much longer you can take it just laying there in front of you, waiting to be opened.

A hundred guys can walk by us, and we never know which one has the junk that fits just right. Is it the tall guy? the well-built guy? the short guy? the unsuspecting, shy guy? the outgoing, confident guy? The smart, unassuming guy? It is the ultimate mystery of the male species... and it's not fucking fair!