"He has to adhere tightly to his excuses and rationalizations, develop a disturbing ability to insulate himself from the pain he is causing and learn to enjoy power and control over his female partners. It is unrealistic to expect such a complex structure, one that takes fifteen or twenty years to form, to vanish like steam.
An abuser learns manipulative and controlling behavior from several different sources, including key male role models, peers, and pervasive cultural messages. By the time he reaches adulthood, he has integratred manipulative behavior to such a deep level that he acts largely on automatic. He knows exactly what he's doing, but not necissarily why."
"I have yet to meet an abuser who has made any meaningful and lasting changes in his behaivor towards female partners through therapy, regardless of how much "insight" - most of it false - that he may have gained. The fact is that if an abuser finds a particularly skilled therapist and if the therapy is especially successful, when he is finishes he will be a happy, well-adjusted abuser - good news for him, perhaps, but not so much for his partner. Psychotherapy can be very valuable for the issues it is devised to address, but partner abuse is not one of them; an abusive man need to be in a specialized abuser's program." - Lundy Bancroft, 'Why Does He Do That'.
With that being said, I cannot waste a lifetime, being treated like shit, on a man that will never be able to have a normal relationship, or even know what normal is. He shouldn't be married, he should be studied!
It's just a sad story for a guy, that met a girl, and fell in love with her the moment that he saw her... But it was just a story, like he said... wasn't it?